Moving Onward

Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful. Yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lengthening, ever-ascending, ever-improving path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, so far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and glory of the climb.”

Sir Winston Churchill

Confucious Say …

“Confucious say: He who know little, soon tell it!” Here are 100 similar humorous anecdotes by the King of wisdom himself. These are great for sharing at parties or among friends or family

  1. Confucius say, virginity like bubble. One prick – all gone

  2. Confucius say, bird in the hand is not better than two in the bush

  3. Confucius say, man who do business in whore house get jerked around

  4. Confucius say, gypsies got no babies because gypsies have crystal balls

  5. Confucius say, panties not best thing on earth, but next to it

  6. Confucius say, war not determine who right. War determine who left

  7. Confucius say, woman who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house

  8. Confucius say, man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night

  9. Confucius say, it take many nail to build crib, one screw to fill it

  10. Confucius say, man who keep feet on ground have trouble putting on pants

  11. Confucius say, if you want pretty nurse, you got to be patient

  12. Confucius say, passionate kiss like spider web, soon lead to undoing of fly

  13. Confucius say, man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day long

  14. Confucius say, couple on seven day honeymoon make whole week

  15. Confucius say, woman who go camping must beware of evil intent

  16. Confucius say, squirrel who runs up woman’s leg not find nuts

  17. Confucius say, man who run before bus get tired

  18. Confucius say, man who run behind bus get exhausted

  19. Confucius say, man with tool in woman’s mouth not necessarily dentist

  20. Confucius say, man who make love on side of hill not on level

  21. Confucius say, sex is like the army, the closer you are to discharge, the better you feel

  22. Confucius say, man with tight trousers is pressing his luck

  23. Confucius say, man who stand on toilet high on pot

  24. Confucius say, man who eat crackers in bed wake up feeling crummy

  25. Confucius say, man with hand in pocket all day not crazy, just feeling nuts

  26. Confucius say, man who sleep in bed of nails is holy

  27. Confucius say, do not drink and park, accidents cause people

  28. Confucius say, man who put pea in soup very unclean

  29. Confucius say, man who run through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok

  30. Confucius say, boy who go to sleep with sex problem on mind wake up with solution in hand

  31. Confucius say, man who fishes in another woman’s well, often catches crab

  32. Confucius say, to meet girl in park is good, but to park meat in girl is better

  33. Confucius say, squirrel lay on rock and crack nuts, man lay on crack and rock nuts

  34. Confucius say, butcher who back into meat grinder get a little behind in his orders

  35. Confucius say, electrician get much angry when find shorts in wife’s bedroom¦

  36. Confucius say, man who shoot off mouth, must expect to lose face

  37. Confucius say, man with big mouth beware of foot

  38. Confucius say, man who fart in church, sit in own pew

  39. Confucius say, woman who fly upside down have crack up

  40. Confucius say, man who leap off cliff jump to conclusion

  41. Confucius say, man under wheelbarrow playing with tool, not necessarily mechanic

  42. Confucius say, house without bathroom is uncanny

  43. Confucius say, foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ

  44. Confucius say, man who sits on stool smells like shit

  45. Confucius say, man who throws dirt is losing ground

  46. Confucius say, woman who go to man’s apartment for snack, get titbit

  47. Confucius say, man who lay woman on ground, get piece on earth

  48. Confucius say, man who get kicked in testicles, left holding the bag

  49. Confucius say, man who kisses girl’s behind, get crack in face

  50. Confucius say, girl who ride bicycle, peddle ass all over town

  51. Confucius say, man with penis in peanut butter jar, fucking nuts

  52. Confucius say, man who buy drowned cat, get wet pussy

  53. Confucius say, man trapped in pantry, have ass in jam

  54. Confucius say, learn to masturbate – come in handy

  55. Confucius say, girl who sit on jockey’s lap get hot tip

  56. Confucius say, girl who sit on judge’s lap get honorable discharge

  57. Confucius say, waitress who sit on leper’s lap, keep tip

  58. Confucius say, man who snort coke, get bubbles up nose

  59. Confucius say, cow with no legs, ground beef

  60. Confucius say, two wrongs not make right, but two rights make U-turn

  61. Confucius say, baby born in car with automatic transmission, grow to become shiftless bastard

  62. Confucius say, finding old man in dark, not hard

  63. Confucius say, man who smoke pot, choke on handle

  64. Confucius say, OK for shit to happen – will decompose

  65. Confucius say, man with head on railroad track, listening for train to come, get splitting headache

  66. Confucius say, man who sneeze without tissue take matter into own hands

  67. Confucius say, secretary become permanent fixture, when screwed on desk

  68. Confucius say, man who drive like hell, bound to get there

  69. Confucius say, man who sit on tack, get point

  70. Confucius say, man who put cream in tart, not always baker

  71. Confucius say, woman who spend much time on bedspring, may get offspring

  72. Confucius say, sex on beach like American beer – fucking near water

  73. Confucius say, man who masturbate, only screwing himself

  74. Confucius say, woman who dance wearing jock strap, have make believe ballroom

  75. Confucius say, support bacteria – is only culture some people have

  76. Confucius say, man with athletic finger, make broad jump

  77. Confucius say, man who sit on upturned tack, rise above all

  78. Confucius say, wash face in morning, neck at night

  79. Confucius say, man who have last laugh, not get joke

  80. Confucius say, man who sleep with old hen, find it better than pullet

  81. Confucius say, man piss in wind, wind piss back

  82. Confucius say, man who eat pussy, do lip service

  83. Confucius say, girl who marry detective, like to kiss dick

  84. Confucius say, men may have more hair on chest than woman, but on the whole, women have more

  85. Confucius say, woman wearing G-string, high on crack

  86. Confucius say, virgin with thimble on finger, never feel prick

  87. Confucius say, man who pull woman’s bra strap, may get bust in face

  88. Confucius say, woman who pounce on dead rooster, go down on limp cock

  89. Confucius say, man who fall in vat of molten glass, make spectacle of self

  90. Confucius say, man who jump through screen door, strain self

  91. Confucius say, man who push piano down mine shaft, likely to get A flat minor

  92. Confucius say, man who put face in punchbowl, get punch in nose

  93. Confucius say, woman who sink in man’s arms, soon have arms in man’s sink

  94. Confucius say, man who put cock on stove, have hot rod

  95. Confucius say, man who fuck in cemetery may end up fucking dead

  96. Confucius say, man who jizz in cash register come into money

  97. Confucius say, man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time

  98. Confucius say, closed mouth catches no flies, but closed fly catches no mouths

  99. Confucius say, man who finger girl having period get caught red handed

  100. Confucius say, man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly fingers

Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening by Robert Frost

Whose woods these are I think I know. His house is in the village though; He will not see me stopping here To watch his woods fill up with snow.

My little horse must think it queer To stop without a farmhouse near Between the woods and frozen lake The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake To ask if there is some mistake. The only other sound’s the sweep Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep, But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep. ”

– Robert Frost

2022 – A Monumental Year

The year 2022 started out with the promise of the end of the COVID-19 global pandemic but quickly showed us the doorstep of World War III with the Russian invasion of Ukraine on February 24th. As it comes to a close, I look back at all the events that took place this year. Some predictable, others not, like my diagnosis with stage-IV prostate cancer in July, and the shocking, though not too surprising tragic death of my son, Mitchell, in the Kansas City area only 2 weeks after my diagnosis.

Continue reading